Title: The Absurd ABC
Author: Walter Crane
Release date: December 11, 2005 [eBook #17283]
Most recently updated: December 13, 2020
Language: English
Credits: Produced by Suzanne Shell, Christine D and the Online
Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
The absurd ABC originally published 1874.
A for the APPLE or Alphabet pie, Which all get a slice of. Come taste it & try. |
B is the BABY who gave Mr Bunting Full many a long day's rabbit skin hunting. |
C for the CAT that played on the fiddle, When cows jumped higher than 'Heigh Diddle Diddle!' |
D for the DAME with her pig at the stile, 'Tis said they got over, but not yet a while. |
E for the Englishman, ready to make fast The giant who wanted to have him for breakfast. |
F for the Frog in the story you know, Begun with a wooing but ending in woe. |
G for Goosey Gander who wandered upstairs, And met the old man who objected to prayers. |
H for poor Humpty who after his fall, Felt obliged to resign his seat on the wall. |
I for the Inn where they wouldn't give beer, To one with too much and no money, I fear. |
J does for poor Jack and also for Jill, Who had so disastrous a tumble down hill. |
K for calm Kitty, at dinner who sat, While all the good folks watched the dog & the cat. |
L for Little man, gun and bullets complete, Who shot the poor duck, and was proud of the feat. |
M for Miss Muffet, with that horrid spider, Just dropped into tea and a chat beside her. |
N for the Numerous children they who Were often too much for their mother in Shoe. |
O the Old person that cobwebs did spy, And went up to sweep 'em Oh ever so high! |
P for the Pie made of blackbirds to sing, A song fit for supper a dish for a king. |
Q for Queen Anne who sat in the sun Till she, more than the lily resembled the bun |
R stands for Richard & Robert, those men Who didn't get up one fine morning till ten! |
S for the Snail that showed wonderful fight, Putting no less than twenty-four tailors to flight! |
T stands for Tom, the son of the piper, May his principles change as his years grow riper. |
U for the Unicorn, keeping his eye on The coveted crown, and 'ts counsel the Lion. |
V for the Victuals, including the drink, The old woman lived on surprising to think! |
W for the WOMAN who not over nice, Made very short work of the three blind mice. |
X is the X that is found upon buns, Which, daughters not liking, may come in for sons. |
Y for Yankee Doodle of ancient renown, Both he & his pony that took him to town. |
Z for the Zany who looked like a fool, For when he was young he neglected his school. |